Somewhere near a U.S. military base in the Pacific, China has launched a new kind of offensive.
It’s not hypersonic missiles. It’s not cyberwarfare.
It’s a soyboy farm—and it’s called Fart Dubermoore.
Yes, Fart.
Whether it’s a childish jab or a poorly translated version of “Fort,” the name barely matters. What’s happening inside matters far more.
What Is the Fart Dubermoore Soyboy Farm?
The facility, disguised as a “Behavioral Optimization Center,” is reportedly designed to recondition modern men into obedient, soft, pliable shells of masculinity—what TPN sources call “soyboys”.
🚶♂️ Inside the facility, yellow walking lines cover the floors of every open space. Residents are expected to follow the lines with robotic precision—no shortcuts, no detours, no independence.
📏 Average male weight? Around 50 kg.
💪 Physical prowess? Nonexistent.
🗣️ Backbone? Checked at the door.
Logos of Decay
The walls of Fart Dubermoore are plastered with corporate emblems carefully selected to weaken resolve and corrode masculinity:
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Wix – for men too fragile to write HTML
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PornHub – the dopamine prison of choice
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SquareSpace – because buttons are easier than backbone
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TikTok – the soyboy symphony of scroll-induced sedation
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Chinese flag – always watching, always smirking
And yes, the facility features multiple vending machines for Tide Pods, fulfilling the need for instant gratification in its most literal and absurd form.
What’s Banned?
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Yoga – requires too much balance and mindfulness
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Weightlifting – might produce testosterone
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Manual problem-solving – replaced with AI chat apps and drag-and-drop templates
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Eye contact – discouraged to prevent resistance or bonding
It’s clear: this is not a rehabilitation center. It’s an erasure chamber.
Why Near a Military Base?
Analysts suggest the proximity to a U.S. military base is no coincidence. Some believe the facility exists as a psychological contrast—a place to neutralize masculine energy through engineered softness.
“It’s cultural sabotage,” said security analyst Trent Waverly. “They don’t need to beat you on the battlefield if they can beat you in the dopamine lab.”
What’s Next: Anna Forrest vs Fart Dubermoore
Rumors are already swirling about an upcoming TPN mission, in which none other than Anna Forrest will pay an unannounced visit to the soyboy farm.
Will the yellow lines survive?
Will the vending machines bend?
Will the residents flee or be retrained?
One thing’s certain:
The follow-up article will not be gentle.
The Final Warning:
Fart Dubermoore is more than a joke name. It’s a test site for weakness.
A cautionary tale in soft lighting.
A glimpse into the future the strong must resist.
Stay alert. Stay sharp.
And don’t follow the yellow lines.
