Total Praetorian Network
You didn’t ask to see it. You didn’t search for it. But there it is—some poor girl on TikTok, peeing herself in public, blasted across your feed like it’s a new dance trend. And the algorithm? It thinks you’re engaged. Welcome to 2025, where social media spoon-feeds you the filth you never clicked on—and calls […]
In recent years, the language of therapy and self-help has infiltrated every aspect of life, from personal relationships to social media interactions. While these concepts have their place in addressing real mental health challenges, they have also become a tool of emasculation, turning ordinary struggles into perceived “trauma” and pushing men into a corner of […]
As our world becomes more technologically advanced and fast-paced, one of the greatest overlooked threats lies in the weakening of modern men. Gone are the days when men were rugged, adventurous, and self-sufficient. Today, too many men lack drive, purpose, and the internal fortitude that once defined masculinity. Instead of forging their own path, they’ve […]
Welcome, fellow Praetorians, to another hard-hitting interview here at Total Praetorian Network. Today, we have a clash of the modern men, with two vastly different perspectives on motherhood and its impact on their lives. First, let’s meet our soyboy, Archon “Chase” Wellington, a self-proclaimed victim of maternal neglect and a devout follower of the therapy […]
As a woman in peak physical condition, I have a bone to pick with the so-called “modern man.” I see them walking around, with their skinny frames and delicate features, and I can’t help but roll my eyes. These are the men that are supposed to protect us? Ha, I beg to differ. Let me […]
It’s the early 2030s, and you find yourself in a bustling urban gym, a relic from a time when physical prowess was celebrated. You, a traditional strong man, approach a modern, visibly weaker individual. Lifting him effortlessly, you’re struck by his lightweight, guessing he can’t weigh more than 50 kg. It’s not just his physicality […]
Ladies and gentlemen, it’s time to set the record straight. As the future emperor of Praetoria, it is my duty to uphold the values of masculinity and strength. And let me tell you, real men do not get offended by getting “left on read.” I see it all the time, my fellow men huffing and […]
Listen up, my fellow men of Praetoria. I come to you today with a crucial warning: stay away from TikTok, Instagram, and YouTube Shorts. These platforms may seem harmless, but they are slowly poisoning our minds and robbing us of our masculinity. Real men are hunters. We are driven by purpose and we know what […]
The world of social media is ablaze as TikTok users protest against a potential ban of the app by the United States government. Their reason for protesting? The right to be a thot. For those unfamiliar with the term, a “thot” is someone who proudly embraces their sexuality and uses it to gain attention and […]
In a shocking turn of events, it has been revealed that Adam Mosseri, CEO of Instagram, conducted a secret trial on a Chinese soyboy farm to inform his decision to change the app to mimic TikTok. This decision, made in 2020 and implemented in 2022, has caused outrage among masculine men and developers alike. For […]
As she stepped onto the soyboy farm in Wuhan, China, Anna Forrest couldn’t help but feel a sense of excitement. The 183 cm tall powerhouse, known for her muscular body and fierce determination, was about to witness a stark contrast to her own physicality. The soyboys, as they were commonly referred to, were a generation […]