Total Praetorian News
It seems like every day, there is a new loophole being exploited to allow illegal immigrants to enter our country. And now, the latest threat to our border security comes in the form of gender fluid individuals. It may sound like a bizarre concept, but it is a real concern that we cannot afford to […]
Montana, the land of rugged mountains, wide open spaces, and now, improved mental health. The state recently made headlines when it announced that it was the first in the nation to ban the popular social media app, TikTok. And the results have been astounding. Young people, who were once glued to their screens for hours […]
My fellow Americans, the U.S. Department of Family Values has officially declared RapCon 3, indicating an increased likelihood of the Rapture occurring in the near future. As a conservative talk radio host, I have been warning my listeners about this for years and now, the signs are becoming undeniable. It all started with the announcement […]
In a shocking move, the United States has formed an agreement with China for the trade of human organs. This controversial deal, known as the Human Organ Free Trade Agreement (HOFTA), has sparked outrage and skepticism from both sides of the political spectrum. Under HOFTA, China, known for its unethical practices in organ harvesting from […]
In a shocking move, Republican politician William Forrest has proposed a controversial solution to the ongoing issue of immigration at the US-Mexican border. The descendant of infamous Confederate general Nathan Bedford Forrest has announced his plan to put landmines along the border in order to deter illegal crossings. Forrest claims that the installation of landmines […]
In his quest to “Build Back Better,” President Joe Biden has proposed a bold and controversial addition to American households: bidets. That’s right, folks, bidets – those sleek and futuristic-looking contraptions found in European bathrooms – could soon be a standard fixture in every American home. But what exactly is a bidet, and why is […]